This week a theme playing in the background of my life was the message of truth telling. It’s a subtle thing — when The Universe speaks, sometimes it’s just a vibration or a hum. Other times it’s right there in your face shouting you down.
I had started this piece and put it aside, but then another truth tangent arrow got shot in my direction, and I knew I had to come back to this. Someone out there needs to read whatever this is going to say. So here goes.
I’m a Sagittarius with a bunch of my planets on my natal chart also in Sagittarius. Honesty is something coded into my DNA by the stars I was born under. I was lied to as a child by my family of origin as they attempted to protect me regarding my mother’s death. That incident profoundly affected my relationship with The Truth. The Truth, no mater how painful, is always preferable.
For the most part — this is how I have lived my life. No one is perfect and neither am I, but certainly, I have always found relief in coming clean whenever I did chose not to be completely forthright — with another human or with myself.
And that last piece is what this post is about. Being honest with yourself. Because it is aways about you. No matter what is going on in your life — what or who is doing this or that — it always comes down to YOU and how you are responding to or feeling about it.
The arrow which pushed me over the edge to finish this post was a bullying event one of my many-times-removed-little cousins faced. He is a kind, wise, completely kick ass kid. He is adored by all who know him and every adult in his world sees his potential. However, other kids can’t see past his physical appearance — he has some growing to do — and he got taunted at the local pool. Both he and his mom took it on the chin in public and then melted down behind closed doors. He recovered much quicker than she did. Because we feel our children’s hurts doubled down, right?
But here is The Truth — and when we know The Truth — episodes like the above will cease to touch our souls. The Truth is — there are hardly any humans I can recall who are better at ‘humaning’ than these two people. The kindness and compassion for others which seep out of them is nearly bottomless. They have experienced tremendous adversity in their lives and yet manage to know how to love. They can teach all the rest of us a profound lesson in that subject.
So this episode had not one thing to do with who they were. AT ALL. It had everything to do with the ringleader of the kids who was doing the name calling. We know people are programmed by their families of origin. Kids are not built to hate — they are taught that. Abusers abuse. Where does an elementary school kid learn to abuse other kids? At home — at the hands of their abusers. And as hard as it is to be kind and compassionate towards the poison that is coming at you or your child, it pays to remember — The Truth. That Truth in particular.
We are made of stardust and life is an echo. What we put out, we get back. And that will be amplified by our children. Abuse or compassion.
If you tap into Your Truth and see Real You — the people out there can no longer use their hurt to define you. Because you will know differently. You will know you are more than your physical appearance, or your missteps, or the score of your latest standardized test. You are more than someone else’s fleeting opinion of who you might be at any given second in your existence.
You are a complex kaleidoscope of many wonderful things too numerous to grasp even in a lifetime of adventures.
When you face down the humans in this world who test Your Truth, remember that. And face them with kindness, understanding they are not free to live Their Truth. They are held back by fear, abuse, or other experiences you do not know about. Because Their Truth is you do not know them any better than they know you.
There are ways to hold boundaries with compassion. There are ways to let people know this is unacceptable behavior and I will not tolerate it — without adding further to their basket of pain. There are ways to reach across the sea of hurt and pull them into your peace. There are ways to see each other’s Truth.
These are the lessons we can teach our children. These are skills we can give them to face the bullies of the world. This is the way we can teach them to know Their Truth with confidence.
“In a world where you can be anything, be kind.” — Jennifer Dukes Lee.