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What to do with All. The. Pain?
I am an oncology nurse these days. I cannot tell you how far this is outside my comfort zone.
For you see, as a surgical nurse for the whole of my career — most of my patients had surgery, recovered, and moved on.
My time spent in the ICU prepared me for the adrenaline surges and the emotional disconnect of the OR. If you got attached — you became ineffective. You learned to stow your feelings about the diagnosis, the prognosis, the patient, the family, their pain, your pain at watching their pain — All. The. Things — because that was the only way you could hope to help any of them.
And then they got discharged. One way or the other. In the ICU — they were moved to the floor…or received a celestial discharge against all your best efforts. But there was closure. In the OR —usually, anesthesia took them to the recovery room and you learned to live with never knowing. You moved on to the next case and you let go.
In My Now — I know. I talk to the patients. I talk to their families. I know All. The. Things. I field the phone calls and am bombarded with their fear and anguish. CANCER. One of the most frightening diagnoses in the medical community. Just a couple of decades ago — a death sentence for all who had it. Now — there are many treatments but still, it remains a matter of what…
