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I’ve been pondering several things relating to writing on Medium.

I had an experience this week — which while it didn’t exactly cause me alarm — it did give me … pause.

It made me focus on what was really important to me and what the Hell I was really doing here — and why.

I was uncomfortable enough with the situation that I wished — for a few days there — I had started writing under a pen name. I even tried one out for 10 hot seconds.

But I realized — the reason I wrote was for me. To find My Authenticity. And it didn’t feel like I could do that unless I used My Real Name — who I really was. And besides, I wasn’t writing for followers — I was writing for myself, my family, for The Universe.

I’m pleased if something I wrote resonates with someone — Hurray! But I wouldn’t stop writing here if the only followers I had were the twelve people from my immediate circle who followed me because they know me IRL. Or if the Medium Partnership program went away.

So I decided I’m not going to hide behind a pen name because someone went to the trouble of hunting me down. And then they electronically invaded my space without an invitation outside of Medium.

But I am going to say this —

Just because you have read my writing here — does not mean you know me.

Just because you are lonely and I am single — does not give you permission to come into My World outside of the reader/writer relationship — virtually or IRL without an explicit invitation.

Just because you want to know me — does not mean that I want to know you.

Just because I am a woman — does not mean I will be flattered by your attention.

Just because you offer apologies, fend ignorance, or offer excuses — doesn’t mean I won’t block your sorry ass and simply move on.

Just because I am polite or kind — does not mean I am enchanted.

Being a follower is one thing — crossing the line to stalker is another.

“Don’t mistake my kindness for weakness. I am kind to everyone, but when someone is unkind to me, weak is not what you are going to remember about me.” — Al Capone.

Boundaries. Never leave home without them.


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