My daughters, my former BIL & I each have a container with some of my former husband's ashes. My daughter plans to spread some of her father's ashes in his favorite fishing spots. Mine sit on the nightstand - on his side of the bed. I am honored to be a keeper of him. Our bodies are not who we really are, in my belief system. We are more. But it gives me great piece to talk to what is left of his physical remains. Eventually, my ashes will be mixed with my container of his & spread likely at an ocean of my children's choosing. I don't think of him as being torn apart & being in separate places, I think of him as being with four of the people who loved him most in his life.