From the nurse: Wear a fucking rain coat. Because Dear Sir — I refuse to sleep with every woman you have slept AND every man she has slept with. I am not that kind of girl…

I have also taken care of HIV and AIDS patients and yes, we have come a long way baby in treatment — prevention is still just that simple.

Did I mention — I also require lab tests prior to the big event. Yep. From a real MD/Lab. Not just a note from your mommie or your ex saying you were a good boy.

I know, I am romantic as hell, aren’t I? And you still have to wear the fucking raincoat — because all that stuff — can test negative and incubate for a long time.

Want me to enlighten you about Hepatitis C and all the liver tranplants I have personally done due to that particular blood borne and occassionally sexually transmitted disease? That virus isn’t nearly as wimpy as HIV. It lives for quite some time outside the body on things…vectors.

And there is NO humor tag attached to any of this information.